This something I’m familiar with.
Growing up in a cult, “shoot the messenger” behavior was the default reaction.
As a parent, I’ve had to work long and hard to ensure ours is not a “shoot the messenger” family; that the person who discovers fraud, abuse, and other difficult to swallow facts isn’t the problem, but rather the people who perpetrated the fraud, waste, or otherwise.
To see this requires honesty, integrity, courage, and a willingness to connect the dots.
It’s not easy, but it’s really the only way forward.